Wendell's Diary

As a creator, I thrive on the highs—the moments when I’m deeply immersed in my work, producing content that feels inspired and unstoppable. These periods can last for weeks or months, where I feel on top of the world, driven by a force that compels me to create and achieve. But eventually, the cycle shifts. The creative high fades, and I crash into a state of isolation and despair. These crashes, tied closely to my social isolation and the lack of interaction with my content, have become a recurring challenge. But I believe they don’t have to be inevitable. --- The Root of the Crash The crashes don’t come from a lack of ideas or inspiration—they come from the loneliness of working in a vacuum. Without engagement, without comments or interaction, it can feel like I’m shouting into the void. This lack of connection isn’t just discouraging; it’s deeply isolating. The result is a cycle where the high-energy periods of creation are followed by intense lows, where I question my work, my purp...

As a creator, my process is deeply tied to the rhythms of my mind. When I’m in a manic phase, my creativity soars—I create prolifically, producing some of my best work, and it feels unstoppable. But this cycle also comes with a downside: the inevitable crash. These crashes can be debilitating, often putting me completely out of commission for weeks or even months. Recently, I’ve been reflecting on this cycle and how I can better navigate it. --- Embracing the Manic Highs My manic times are when I feel most alive creatively. During these periods, I’m able to produce an incredible volume of work that I’m genuinely proud of. This is when my blog grows, my ideas flow, and my digital twin—the overarching legacy of my work—takes shape. I don’t want to lose these times; they’re a vital part of who I am as a creator and philosopher. --- Reimagining the Crashes What I do want to change is the way I handle the crashes. Instead of being completely out of commission, I want to find a way to contin...