Wendell's Diary

There’s a whole world out there, teeming with life and activity, yet here I am, existing independently of it. Despite my best efforts, it often feels like I’m not part of the world at all. Over the years, I’ve poured my heart and soul into creating content. I’ve made countless videos, written books, maintained a blog, and even set up a forum. I’ve written extensively and produced numerous videos, but the audience remains elusive. Hardly anyone watches the videos, reads the blog, or engages with the forum. So why do I keep going? Because I hold onto the hope that one day, there will be a beautiful, miraculous moment when everything clicks. Suddenly, I’ll have an audience, and people will see me. It’s this hope that keeps me working hard, even when it feels like I’m invisible. I do have a few fans, but they are few and far between. However, I know my content is awesome. I believe it’s worth reading and watching. I’m convinced that what I’m doing is important and has the potential to help...

For five long years, I traveled around Australia while experiencing homelessness. It was a time filled with immense challenges, but also moments of unexpected beauty and discovery. Despite the hardships, I kept creating and uploading videos to YouTube, driven by the hope of finding friendship and support. #### The Darkest Times During my homeless years, I often felt a deep sense of despair. There were times when I was hurting so badly that I longed for a shoulder to cry on. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find anyone to turn to. I reached out to people on the internet, seeking their support, but no one seemed interested. The pain and loneliness were overwhelming, and I found myself on the brink of giving up more than once. #### The Drive to Create In those dark moments, I found solace in creating videos. I wanted to leave something meaningful behind, something that could outlast me. Even though my videos were long and often tailored more for myself than for an audience, they were my way of r...

In today's world, technology often gets a bad rap. People talk about digital minimalism and reducing screen time, but for some of us, technology is not just a tool—it's a lifeline. As someone who doesn't have many social connections, I find that technology plays a crucial role in my life, and it's anything but unhealthy. Technology has become my gateway to knowledge and growth. With a smartphone or a computer, I have access to the collective wisdom of human civilization. Whether it's learning new skills, diving into complex philosophical ideas, or staying updated with the latest advancements in AI, technology has made me smarter and more informed. For me, technology is also a source of connection. While I might not have a large circle of friends, platforms like YouTube and forums allow me to engage with like-minded individuals who share my interests. It's not just about consuming content—it's about participating in discussions, sharing ideas, and feeling par...

Loneliness is something I’ve struggled with for a long time. There are days when it feels overwhelming, but I want to share my journey and how I strive every day to resolve it. It’s a tough road, but each day is an opportunity to make things better. I often find myself feeling isolated, but I refuse to let it define me. Instead, I use my loneliness as a motivator to work harder and improve my life. Whether it's through creating content, engaging with my audience, or simply reflecting on my thoughts, I’m always looking for ways to connect with others. Every day, I take small steps to reach out and find friends. It’s not always easy, and sometimes it feels like progress is slow, but I believe in the process. I push myself to be open, to share my thoughts and experiences, and to engage with the world around me. There are moments of frustration and setbacks, but I keep moving forward. I remind myself that each interaction, no matter how small, brings me closer to finding genuine connec...