Wendell's Diary

Tuning a lyre is an art in itself—a slow, deliberate process that requires patience and focus. As each string is adjusted, there’s a sense of mindfulness, a meditative state that takes over, grounding you in the present moment. You listen intently, watching the note carefully, and make tiny, incremental adjustments. Over time, the chaotic vibrations of misaligned strings emerge into harmony, creating a beautiful, resonant sound. This process of tuning aligns deeply with the Philosophy of Emergence, where progress and meaning reveal themselves naturally through consistent effort and observation. Just as a lyre can’t be tuned hastily—its strings needing time to stretch and settle into their proper tension—so too does life require a similar approach. Growth, understanding, and harmony emerge slowly, one adjustment at a time. Tuning a lyre teaches us to appreciate the journey, not just the result. It’s not about rushing to play the first song but about embracing the act of preparation. Thi...

Schizophrenia is often misunderstood. It’s a condition that shapes how I perceive the world and how I navigate it. For me, it’s not about hearing voices or seeing things that aren’t there; it’s about how my thoughts and perceptions sometimes diverge from reality, especially when I’m unmedicated. But at the same time, it’s deeply tied to my creativity and sense of purpose. This is my story of how schizophrenia has impacted my life, my work, and my relentless drive to create. --- Understanding My Schizophrenia When I was diagnosed with schizophrenia, it was because I wasn’t perceiving reality in the same way as others. For years, I held strong delusions—I believed I was a prophet, a chosen one here to save the world. My thinking was intense and obsessive, and I couldn’t see the harm in the decisions I was making. But I wasn’t alone in this struggle. During that time, I was also homeless, without support, and constantly fighting for survival. Schizophrenia magnified everything, making it ...

The Philosophy of Emergence is a simple yet profound way to approach life. It’s about letting meaning, truth, and understanding reveal themselves naturally. Instead of imposing preconceptions or rushing to conclusions, it encourages patience, observation, and alignment with the flow of life. This philosophy can be applied to everything from personal growth to relationships, creativity, and education. Let’s explore it through analogies that capture its essence. --- 1. Naming the Painting After It’s Finished Imagine an artist who doesn’t name their painting until the very last stroke is on the canvas. Each brushstroke is an exploration, a discovery, and only when the image is complete does its meaning become clear. This is the Philosophy of Emergence—letting the process guide you to the final result instead of forcing a predetermined idea onto the work. --- 2. A Seed Becoming a Tree When you plant a seed, you don’t tell it how to grow. You nurture it with water, sunlight, and care, and o...

I’ve found a new rhythm in my creative process, one that emphasizes **constant creation** over reflection on my past work. Instead of spending time revisiting old writings and videos, I focus on generating fresh content. This shift in mindset has transformed how I work, making my approach more productive and innovative. **Always Looking Ahead**: Reflecting on past work can be valuable, but I’ve discovered that continuously **creating new material** keeps my ideas flowing and my perspective evolving. If I revisit topics I’ve explored before, I do so from new angles, infusing my content with fresh insights and updated views. **Productivity Through Creation**: By prioritizing the creation of new work, I maintain a **steady momentum**. This approach helps me stay engaged and inspired, as I’m always exploring new ideas and pushing my creative boundaries. It’s a method that fosters growth and keeps my content dynamic and relevant. **A Fresh Take on Familiar Themes**: Even when I revisit subj...

I’ve been diagnosed with **schizophrenia** by doctors, but I’ve always felt conflicted about this label. On one hand, I don’t see myself as schizophrenic. On the other hand, this diagnosis has provided me with a **disability pension** that significantly improves my lifestyle. This paradox is something I’ve been grappling with, and I wanted to share my thoughts. **Do I Feel Schizophrenic?**: Based on my own experiences and interactions, I don’t believe I fit the typical image of schizophrenia. My thoughts and actions don’t seem to align with what I’ve read or been told about the condition. However, mental health diagnoses can be complex, and how we perceive ourselves may not always match medical assessments.  **The Diagnosis Dilemma**: Being diagnosed with schizophrenia has undoubtedly changed my life. It’s brought me a sense of security through the disability pension, allowing me to focus on what I love—writing, creating, and exploring philosophical ideas—without the constant worry...