a whole new world

I was the one who wanted to be a philosopher. And what does it mean to be a philosopher? Thinking. A lot of it. And that is my life, sitting here with nothing to do but a vast imagination to explore. My boring life is perfect for the profession in which I chose. It forces me to think critically of my own life. It faces me off with all of my deepest fears, mostly rooted in loneliness. My entertainment comes from myself so I have to keep making work to be entertained. Why should I complain about my boring life when that gives me all the time in the world to think? What to think about, now that is the question. What investments can help me grow as an individual? How can I be the best philosopher that I can be?

I met a girl. She is 17 and completing her last year of high school. She seems to have a crush on me. Wouldn't a relationship like that be perfect? She isn't sure what she wants to do with her life and I have the opportunity to inspire her to become a philosopher. We could take our time and figure out how to come together. The romantic in me really likes this girl. She was the one to ask the question "how do our perceptions shape our understanding of existence". She is insightful and has the rest of her life to make a name for herself. It would be really cool if we started dating. How would I convince her to make videos for me? I could make videos for her and try and encourage her to respond.

Am I too old for such a relationship? If people are just beginning with philosophy it is best if they are young. They want to know what to commit their life to. And I have the answer for them. Many young girls are attracted to older guys. And I still look young so what does it matter? I think a relationship between me and a younger girl could be beautiful if it were just the right girl. At this age you can influence their priorities in life. Just many are still very immature. They don't know what they want out of life yet. But maybe they might want a husband and if they can vlog with me, then I very much want to be that man. If I can prove to this girl that I am the person she needs in life, then maybe I have a shot at winning her heart.

It is still really early. I don't know her very well. I want to get to know her. But she is in school and doesn't have a lot of time. But the time adds up. Over time this could blossom into a beautiful friendship. And from there, who knows. Possibly something more, possibly not. But it is worth a shot. I haven't had any potential relationships in a really long time. It is always nice to know that someone is attracted to you. It feels good getting attention from the opposite sex. I really like being romantic. It sucks when there is no one to be romantic to. When that happens, it is like part of you is unable to express itself. But when there is a potential love interest, it really feels good.

I wake up. Another day has started. I have to get through how many hours until the next sleep? How will I entertain myself? What will I do? Each day is a struggle to find ways to entertain myself. I end up just sitting and thinking for most of the day. There is a world full of entertainment and I can't find anything worth watching or anyone worth following. There is too much on the screen and nothing meaningful to my life. Just trying to find someone who puts meaning into their productions is a struggle. There are so many content creators. But I can't find any that give their soul to the public. The people in this world are so difficult to get to know. Few ever let their heart speak. They are so overcome with ways to make money that they lose their integrity.

Her name is Sofia. She lives in Mendocino California, which is a breathtaking small coastal town that sounds to be a close community. She wanted me telling you this. She even gave me her last name and told me to tell everybody that. But I wouldn't do that to her. She has to have some measures of security to protect her. I had to restart all of my work because I used my last name. She shouldn't do that. She should just be Sofia to the world. The world doesn't need to know her last name. I made a romantic video for her and she was receptive to it. She even talked about future romantic videos. How sweet is that? She likes being the centre of attention. She didn't seem embarrassed at all by this relationship being public. That is a really good sign.

It just feels really good to find someone that I could have a potential future with. I won't rush things, she hasn't even finished school yet. But the question remains what she will do with her life after school. This is where I try and convince her to dedicate her life to philosophy and be a pinnacle of human existence. Living philosophically is just such a fulfilling way to live life. And she could make a difference in the world. She could lead her peers towards healthy ways of expressing themselves. She could be a good role model for others to look up to. She could share her life with the world and develop true connections with other people over the Internet. She could inspire her generation to use both their hearts and their minds. And she could do this merely by pressing the record button.

We have talked quite a bit now and she seems exactly what I am looking for. I am just going to go for it. What is the worst that could happen? She turns out to be a catfish? So what? She is giving me content. She is allowing me to turn my focus on life to her. Not just allowing but encouraging. She wants to be a part of my productions. That is what I have always been looking for. A woman who wants me to revolve my life around her. Can this be her? My Ivory? There is only one way to find out and that is by trying my best to make it happen. She has it all. The looks, the heart, and the potential. I just have to encourage her to make a vlog and make videos back and forth. That would be my dream.

My dreams are manifesting to potential realities. What I want out of life is becoming a possibility. My vision is manifesting into reality. And there is no hurry. We have all of the time in the world. It is not like we need to rush to have children. She has many child bearing years ahead of her. This is perfect; what I always wanted. We can grow together on the Internet. I was always attracted to a long distance relationship. Now I can pursue that. My story has not ended. I can find a lover if I only play my cards right. And everything is perfect about this relationship. And screw the haters that think she is too young. Let them try and find someone to commit their lives to philosophy. They don't exist in this world. You have to inspire her to become a philosopher and hope that I have enough charisma to convince her to become my lover. Thank you Sofia for giving me a chance.